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October 17, 1997     The Message
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October 17, 1997

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2 The Message M for Catholics of Southwestern Indiana October 1' When he,(or she) doesn't, respect . , 000000:0000owyoud00ting "i': ' In any event, you show respect for I Are you among the millions that have become asking another to respect your needs. This is You took your coat off/And stood in the rain/You were always crazy like that/And I watched from out my window/Always felt I was outside/Looking in on you/You were always/The mysterious one/With dark eyes and careless halr/You were fashionably sensitive/But too cool to care/You stood in the door- way/With nothing to say/Besides some/com- ments/On the weather/Well in case you fail to notice/In case you fail to see/This is my heart/Bleed- ing before you/This gets me down on my knees REFRAIN These foolish games/Are tearing me apart/And your thoughtless words/Are breaking my heart/Breaking my heart You're always brilliant/In the morning/Smoking your cigarettes/And talking over coffee/Your philosophies on art/Baroque moved you,/You loved Mozart/And you speak/Of your loved ones/As I clumsily/Strummed my guitar/Well excuse me/For I have mistaken you/For somebody else/Somebody who gave a damn/Somebody more like myself REPEAT REFRAIN Jewell fans? If so, you are lucky to enjoy two current versions of her song "Foolish Games." I chose the version that appears on the "Batman and Robin" soundtrack for this column. Some of you may prefer the original on her best-selling "Pieces of You" CD. The song describes a painful situation. A woman has fallen in love with someone who knows how to be "fashionably sensitive" but who is "too cool to care." Realizing what is going on, the woman says to her guy: "These foolish games are tearing me apart, and your thoughtless words are breaking my heart." We might wonder why she remains in the rela- tionship. Clearly, one way out of playing "foolish games" is to refuse to be treated that way. That would mean standing up for herself. She needs to address the guy's behavior. If he wants her in his life, he will listen to what she says. He might recognize how he emotionally distances himself from her. Perhaps he has a fear of being close to someone. Maybe he doesn't know how to share his heart. How- ever, with either concern, he may be able to learn to respond in new ways. Of course, it's not guaranteed foundation for any healthy relationship: two first valuing and caring about their own selves. Sometimes, it takes courage to address person's unfair behaviors. However, this cisely the step needed to empower change. Most of us react as if we are on auto-pilot we recognize the consequences of what we Then we can evaluate and decide what is truly i important. Often this means making significant can grow in the way e love another F that establish a place for greater fairness and respect in the relationship. Even when you are just dating another, important to recognize and confront "foolish God respected each of us -- so much, in are created in God's image. We must not aside this God-given dignity. If others do not treat us in ways dignity, we must ask them to change. If they do I do so, then it is time to leave Your comments are always welcome. Charlie Martin, 7125 W 200S, Rockport, Ind. THE CATHOLIC COMMUNICATION CAMPAIGN NEW YORK (CNS) w The fol- lowing are capsule reviews of movies recently reviewed by the U.S. Catholic Conference (USCC) Office for Film and Broadcasting. Ratings are also given by the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA). "Gang Related" (MGM) Shoddy crime story in which two corrupt cops (Tupac Shakur and James Belushi) unwittingly murder an undercover DEA agent, then try to frame a home- less drunk (Dennis Quaid) for what they did. Writer-director Jim Kouf's shrill tale is lamely scripted, poorly acted and bereft  of suspense. Intermittent vio- lence, rationalization of murder, brief nudity, much profanity and nonstop rough language. The uscc classification is O morally offensive. The MPAA rating is R -- restricted. "Love Always" (Legacy) While mulling a marriage proposal, a young woman (Marisa Ryan) hitchhikes across the country and meets a num- ber of oddballs along the way before returning to answer her suitor. Despite its earnest tone, director Jude Pauline Eber- hard's quirky road movie does little more than sketch in the characters in a narrative too episodic to be very involving. Bedroom scene with brief nudi- ty, intermittent rough language and occasional profanit],: The USCC classification is A-III -- adults. The MPAA rating is R -- restricted. "Seven Years in Tibet" (TriStar) Flawed, fact-based dramatiza- tion about the transformation of an arrogant Nazi mountain climber (Brad Pitt) who 'in 1942 escapes a British internment camp in the Himalayas and walks 1,500 miles to the holy city of Lhasa, Tibet, where he befriends, then tutors the teen-age Dalai Lama qamyang Wangchuk) while, in the process, becoming spiritually centered himself. Directed by Jean-Jacques Annaud, the scenic vistas are visually stunning but the lead character's inner regen- eration is dramatically uncon- vincing. Brief battlefield violence and a gory mountaineering acci- dent. The USCC classification is A-II  adults and adolescents. The MPAA ralng is PG-13  par- ents are strongly cautioned that some material may be inappro- priate for children under 13. "U-Turn" (TriStar) Gore-soaked tale of a grungy gambler (Sean Penn) whose car breaks down in an Arizona desert town whose vicious resi- dents variously beat, rob and lure him into committing mur- der. Directed by Oliver Stone, the repugnant result wallows in gleeful killings, sordid lust and murderous greed. Excessive violence, numerous explicit sex- NCCB offers strategies for better youthministry Renewing the Vision: A Frame- work for Catholic Youth Ministry, National Conference of Catholic Bishops, 1997 60 Pages $9.95 through USCC / $5.00 to Pastor- appointed Youth Leaders (through the Diocesan Youth Office); Free to Book Review By MICHAEL H. EPPLER Director, Office of Youth and Young Adult Ministry Parish Pastors and Pastoral Life Coordinators (through the Youth Office). USCC Publication Num- ber 5-004. [800-235-8722 or wu,.nccbuscc.orgl Any Church leader who is contemplating an intentional ministry with youth will find this document extremely help- ful. Passed unanimously by the Bishops of the United States, Renewing the Vision of Youth Ministry is a milestone in offer- ing the philosophical, theologi- cal, and practical implications of connecting adolescents to the life, mission, and ministry of the Family and Parish. The docu- ment is comprehensive in its call for the integration of youth into family and parish pastoral life and it offers concrete strate- gies for an effective ministry with youth. The Diocese of Evansville has been implementing this "renewed vision" through such offerings as "Youthworks," "Family Works," "Faith Ways," and "Confirming Disciples." All of these texts are integrated aspects of the NCCB pastoral letter on Youth Ministry. The NCCB Letter on Youth Ministry, "Renewing the Vision," will be the primary guide for parishes who seek assistance from the Office of Youth and Young Adult Ministry. The National Conference of Catholic Bishops meet three times a year to discuss the pas- toral needs of the people of their respective dioceses. The NCCB issues Pastoral Letters (The Challenge of Peace, Economic Justice for All, Brothers and Sis- ters to Us) which helps to clari- fy and strengthen the Church's Teachings on important issues which are specifically germane to Americans. "Renewing the Vision" is an Episcopal docu- ment which is supported by Bishop Gerald A. Gettelfinger. Catholics who would like access to NCCB or United States Catholic Conference (USCC) documents may call the toll-free number listed in the opening credits of this review. ual encounters tinuous rough language. classification is O offensive. The restricted. "Washington (Holl Sobering Henry James' tale plain young heiress Jason Leigh) is eager to' attentive suitor (Ben even father him as a gold to disinherit her. Agnieszka Holland woman's hard-won esteem despite male but the solemn sy attempt to make (Vanessa Redgrave) ure diminish the tional impact. A love as well as a gore. The USCC A-II  adults and The MPAA rating parental guidance JORN The 21 Washington, IN Business: 254-7794 Ho: ! DEWIG BROS PACKING FRESH MEAT BEEF AND HAUBSTADT, INDIANA