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October 10, 1997     The Message
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October 10, 1997

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2 The Message -- for Catholics of Southwestern Indiana + Getting pushed around By CHARLIE MARTIN Oh but don&apos;t bowl me over/Just wait a minute/Well CNS Columnist it kinda fell apart,/Things get so crazy, crazy/Don't rush this baby,/Don't rush this baby PUSH (REPEAT REFRAIN) She said I don't know/If I've ever been good enough/I'm a little rusty,/And I think my head/Is caving in/And I don't know/If I've ever really been loved/By a hand that's touched me,/Well I feel like something's/Gonna give/And I'm a little/Bit angry, well This ain't over,/No not here, not while/I still need you/Around/You don't owe me,/We might change/Yeah we just/Might feel good REFRAIN I wanna push you around,/I will, I will/I wanna push you around,/i will, I will/I wanna take you for granted,/I wanna take you for granted/I will She said I don't know/Why you ever would lie to me/Like I'm a little untrustingJWhen I think that the truth is/Gonna hurt ya/And I don't know why/You couldn't just stay with me/You couldn't stand/To be near me/When my face don't seem/To want to shine/Cuz it's a little/Bit dirty, well Don't just stand there,/Say nice things to me/I've been cheated/I've been wronged and you/You don't know me,/I can't change/I won't do anything at all (REPEAT REFRAIN) Written by Rob Thomas/Matt Serletic Sung by Matchbox 20 Copyright (c) 1996 by EMI Blackwood Music Inc. (BMI) Is it ever all right to push another around? How about taking a person for granted? Matchbox 20's "Push" raises these questions. Some have expressed their disapproval of the song. They believe it advocates violence against women. However, writer and group member Rob Thomas says that the song has no such intent. Rather, it is a personal reflection on an abusive relationship that he had trouble leaving. It is true that abusive relationships afflict the lives of both men and women. Others can "push you around" in several ways, not just physically. Howev- er, there is no situation when abuse of any type is acceptable. The song presents clues to how abuse gets passed on from generation to generation. The woman in the song says, "I don't know if I've ever been good enough." She also wonders "if I've ever really been loved by a hand that's touched me." Consequently, she feels like "something's gonna give, and I'm a lit- tle bit angry." Actually, she's probably a whole bunch angry! The anger feeds the cycle that passes on into a current relationship. When people are disrespected or abused, ciallv as children, they do not f being "good enough." The abuse is like a shade i blocks out one's sense of his or her God-given ty. I know about these realities because of my growing up in an abusive family. Thus, teen who experiences similar circumstances to that there is a path that leads us beyond the abuse. You do not have to end up pushing around, as described in the song. ;' The first step is to face your own feelings. up your courage, and go to a trusted adult. Tell person what emotions you are person to help you find the right professional for healing your hurt. Many communities have teen grou F peers help each other face difficult groups provide the support, the insight and the ty needed to move forward. Talk to your parish youth minister or high school counselor about get involved with such a group. The cycle of abuse stops when individuals upon their courage and tell the good relationships based on pushing another around or taking another for granted. Reach out the healing and the hope that God offers. Your comments are always welcome. Charlie Martin, 7125 W 200S, Rockport, Ind. 47635. I THE CATHOLIC COMMUNICATION CAMPAIGN NEW YORK (CNS) --The fol- lowing are capsule reviews of movies recently reviewed by the U.S. Catholic Conference (USCC) Office for Film and Broadcasting. Ratings are also given by the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA). "The Ice Storm" (Fox Searchlight) Somber drama set during Thanksgiving week in a 1973 suburb where a wife 0oan Allen) learns her husband (Kevin Kline) is having an affair with a neigh- bor (Sigourney Weaver), while the neglected adolescent off- spring of both families furtively explore their sexuality until a sudden ice storm causes a sober- mg tragedy by Lee, the movie does a marvelous job in re-creating the era and its dis- contents in following the disor- dered emotional lives of its char- actors and the consequences of FLOWERS & MORE Complete Floral Service i"- FREE --- ] SERVICING ALL I CITY-WIDE[ AREA HOSPffALS "-DELNERY-' & FUNERAL HOMES Heaven y Creations Brillging Sl)iril and light int( y<)ur h(mle t:IU00F, lnsl)irational (;ift brochure FREE call 1-888-294-8104 24 hrs. Ashley-llyler l)r()ducts, Inc. (812) 424-8931 1-800-545-7296 Bob Jacobs 11300 West Franklin St., Evansville ii I I II II z, their parental neglect of family responsibilities. Numerous sexu- al situations, occasional profani- ty and some rough language. The USCC classification is A-IV -- adults, with reservations. The MPAA rating is R -- restricted. "Kiss the Girls" (Paramount) Lurid thriller in which a police psychologist (Morgan Freeman) hunts down a serial killer hold- ing his niece and other young women, one (Ashley Judd) of whom escapes to join in the cop's desperate race to find the psycho and his prey. Director Gary Fled- er's formula police drama is moderately suspenseful but rather brutal in its depiction of life-and-death confrontations. Some vicious violence, frequent rough language and a few instances of profanity. The USCC classification is A-W -- adults, with reservations. The MPAA rating is R -- restricted. "The Lay of the Land" (Northern Arts) Pathetic seriocomic tale of hus- band-and-wife college professors (Sally. Kellerman and Ed Begley II P MUENSTERMAN S FIRESTONE SERVICE, INC. 1400 W. Franklin Evansville, IN 4245000 I I II Jr.) trying to ease mid-life crises by having madcap affairs which only magnify their marital prob- lems. Writer-director Larry Arrick's juvenile attempt at poignant comedy is pretentious- ly misconceived, atrociously acted and badly edited. Comic treatment of adultery, brief vio- lence, some nudity, occasional profanity and intermittent rough language. The USCC classifica- tion is A-III -- adults. The MPAA rating is R -- restricted. "The Locusts" (Orion) Tawdry tale of domestic dys- function on a 1960s Kansas ranch whose promiscuous owner (Kate Capshaw) treats her disturbed son (Jeremy Davies) like a slave until a defiant new employee (Vince Vaughn) decides to help the lad stand up to her. Writer- director John Patrick Kelly's intended tragedy is overwrought with so many lurid revelations it fails to register as a credible story with any emotional resonance. Brief but ugly violence including off-screen suicides, many per- verse sexual references, implied sexual encounters, some profan- I II II ., (812)254-2641 SAVINGS BANK, FEB 200 E. Van Trees St., Washington 500 Main St., Petersburg II IIII ity and minimal rough language. The USCC classification is A-IV -- adults, with reservations. The MPAA rating is R -- restricted. "The Matchmaker" (Gramercy) Weak romantic comedy set in Ireland, where a U.S. senator's aide (Janear,e Garofalo) research- ing the politician's Irish roots finds herself beset by a pro- fessional matchmaker (Milo O'Shea) hoping to interest her in a local bartender (David O'Hara). Directed by Mark Joffe, the flimsy story is overly contrived but the authentic Irish settings and crafty characters provide some entertaining com- pensations. Implied premarital encounter, fleeting violence and recurring profanity and rough language. The USCC classifica- tion is A-III -- MPAA rating is R "Soul Food" (20th Century Spirited ensemble lows the that bind three (Vanessa L. Williams, and Nia Long) in an African-American their peacekeeping goes into a diabetic coma. director George Tillmata comedic drama is sentimental, but ends up as i tament to the loving ships that families are all Fleeting violence, scenes, occasional recurring rough USCC classification is adults. The MPAA restricted. :" REGIONAL FIRE RALLY DON,T MISS FIRE LOUISVILLE Spirit of the Living God, come afresh on us/ '7 have come to cast fire on the earth; were already set ablaze" Luke 12:49 Faith, Intercession, Repentance, and Evangelism Join the Fire Team of Fr. Michael Scanlon, T.O.R., Fr. John Bertolucci, Raph Martin and Ann Shields on Saturday, October 1 from 9:00 am,-5:30 p.m. at Louisville Gardens, 525 W. Ali Blvd., Louisville, Ky., and spark the fire Live the experience that thousands of Catholics have felt these 9 years at Fire Rallies throughout the U.S. and abroad. Deepen your commitment to Christ and experience renewal of! your baptismal vows. Donation: Advance -- $12; At the door -- $15. Contact the Marian Center now to register or for more information. ! The Marian Center 165 Sears Ave., Louisville, KY 40207 (502) 899-5125; fax (502) 423-1584