27, 1998 The Message -- for Catholics of Southwestern Indiana 1 3
il ,
JIM and ANN CAVERA
furniture was nothing more than a
my parents had selected. The
was when my brothers and
spot from which to view the new
After our marriage furniture
as we gradually accumulated a
of chil-
over. Now that we have
of our lives, we have taken
and, more specifi-
to celebrate
anniversary by gifting ourselves
chairs that we might enjoy for the
For years we had been sitting on old
Chairs
wood framed furniture with cushions. It was right out
of the sixties and very practical. What it lacked was
comfort. No matter how many throw pillows we used,
we still ended up with aching backs. Years ago we did-
n't notice the discomfort so much or, perhaps, it just
didn't matter since we were so over-committed we did-
n't have time to sit very long in one place.
I can easily bring up memories from childhood of
my father's overstuffed chair and foot stool. His spe-
cial chair has passed the test of time and comfort and
it remains the center piece of the family room. Dad
always falls asleep soon after he settles down in his
chair, much to my delight and now the delight of his
grandchildren. It has long been a source of gentle teas-
ing. When I go home for a visit I like to sneak in his
chair for a few minutes of quiet time and reminiscing.
Probably the oldest chair remaining in our family
belonged to Aunt Delia and it occupies a spot'in the
gathering room at my inlaws home. It has an unusual
shape to it with a very short back and an especially
long seat. Its original upholstery reflects the style of
the thirties and, in spite of its worn appearance, it is
surprisingly comfortable. A gentle rocking motion
quickly induces memories of fiesty Aunt Delia's fruit
cakes and the feud she had with a neighbor over a
certain pecan tree. We wanted chairs like Dad's or
Aunt Delia's that would someday be counted as
memory-filled heirlooms.
After much time and numerous trial sittings, we
decided on a matched set of absolutely wonderful
recliners. Now there are days when we actually look
forward to getting home and into our chairs. They
have a quality that allows us to relax and let go of our
concerns. They have gradually become a place to refo-
cus our thoughts, to share our ideas and our dreams
-- and even to pray. We had never thought that furni-
ture could so impact our lives. Ann observed that
when our chairs are in their reclining position, they
resemble the palm of a hand. This brought to mind
that beautiful song "On Eagles Wings" with its
promise of total peace and comfort in the Lord's
hands. In the second half a blessing can come in the
shape of a good chair.
-- By Jim Cavera
Jim and Ann Cavera live and work in Evansville.
Their column is a regular feature of the Message.
1
may be anger at
who don't
and lesbian chil-
tOWard those
be of
change
their
)t, as parents
their chil-
Welfare and
"Parents are
have a
hard life.' There is also the fear
of AIDS."
Father Nugent reminded those
attending the seminar that the
bishops' statement "tells the par-
ents to listen to their feelings,
because they are the clues to
what you are called to do."
As families struggle through
these emotions, it's important
that they "accept their children.
Don't break off contact. Don't
reject your children. Your chil-
dren may need you now more
than ever."
Box 68 • Montgomery, Indiana 47558
Phone: 486-3285
"A Family Serving Families"
I]RAI)LEY'S COLONIAL CHAPEL, INC.
1005 E. Main Street
BOonville, Indiana 47601
812-897-1459
Ann M. Bradley-Holland
Flmeral Director
Funeral News number" 897-6805
8ts. Joan of Arc and Patrick School
, Kokotno, IN
Elementary School Principal
School is know for a strong commitment to faith, a state
and a dedicated staff. We have active support
Our two facility campus serves two parishes and
through grade 7 program.
3 and knowledgeable in curriculum & instruction,
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Steven Kuhlman
Joan of Arc & Patrick School
1230 N. Armstrong Street
Kokomo, IN 46901
It is also important for fami-
lies to seek "appropriate help"
both for the children and for the
parents. The bishops' state-
ments suggests looking for a
therapist "who has an apprecia-
tion of religious values and who
understands the complex nature
of sexuality."
Parents are advised to "accept
the reality that help may not
change your child's sexual ori-
entation."
In the section titled "Accept-
ing God's Plan and the Church's
Ministry," the U.S. bishops
write, "Every person has an
inherent dignity because he or
she is created in God's image."
They add, "Like all gifts from
God, the power and freedom of
sexuality can be channeled
toward good or evil."
The Church teaches that
"homogenital behavior is objec-
tively immoral," but the bishops'
statement makes a distinction
between this behavior and a
homosexual orientation, which
is not immoral in itself. "It's
important not to confuse the per-
son with the orientation or
Memorial Hospital and Health Care Center
now offers Natural Family Planning, a program
that uses a couple's knowlege of their own
fertility to achieve or avoid pregnancy.
Taught by a highly trained
specialist in the Creighton
Model techniques of natural
family planning, the program
is based on the guidelines of
the Pope Paul VI Institute for the
Study of Human Reproduction
and is acceptable within the
moral teachings of the Catholic
Church. An introductory
session is followed by a series
of appointments scheduled at
the couple's convenience.
For more information, please call:
Community Relations
482-0636 or (800) 852-7279, ext. 636
And Health Care Center
800V/gdt Street A lui, lndl • 81Z/48Z.ZN5
behavior," Father Nugent said.
The pastoral recommenda-
tions include the advice that
parents "not blame themselves
for homosexual orientations in
their children." And accepting
their children's sexual orienta-
tion does not mean that they
have to approve or accept all of
their children's behaviors.
Parents should continue to
encourage Chfldm tO' ' :
remain united with the Church.
The pastoral also recom-
mends that church ministers
"seek out those in the margins,"
Father Nugent said.
The conclusion of the bishops"
statementoffers a word to "our
homosexual brothers and sis-
ters." They are asked to "not
walk away from your families,
from the Christian community,
from all those who love you"
even though "you may feel dis-
couraged, hurt or angry."
They are reminded that "in
you God's love is revealed. You
are always our children."
Father Nugent concluded his
remarks by noting, "how we
use this letter is up to us."
[ [i ii
MUENSTERMAN'S
UNITED SOUTitWEST BANK FIR ESTONE
---= SERVICE, INC.
1400 w. Franklin
Evansville, IN
4245000
i i i i ii i
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Atovh00 llZ Storalte
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