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February 12, 1993     The Message
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February 12, 1993

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The Message -- for Catholics of Southwestern Indiana Entertainment February On the Record By CHARLIE MARTIN CNS Columnist readiness for marriage Tell the Truth Written by Jude Cole and James Newton this Howard other Something about the way/Your eyes lately/Look up Sung by Jude Cole and down/And everywhere but me/Something about Copyright (c) 1991 by EMI Blackwood Music, or teen makes a " tonight/l know is missing/And I know it's more than Coleision Music, BMS and MCA Music;  you both interact insecurity and 1992 by Reprise Records 3. How do you deal with con or no conflict has occurred while REFRAIN: After all, all the tff/We've spent together Most serious dating relationships arrive at dating, Don't you think I d feel something?/IfI this question: "Are we headed toward marriage other very well or t have toremd your mind/Maybe we're just or should'we look for a long-term commitment hag problems. timeFl'ell the truth/You know my )no .truth tht sense in/Going on this way, baby/You's time to say what you mean/There's no sense going out/Trying to replace/A love that never came (REPEAT REFRAIN) somehow it over somehow/{Start it ,,your love/Back to me a stand." So if you want to be mine/Baby, let's stoi) wasting time/lust tell the truthPCause you know my heart/Is in your hand/So give it up or takea stand/lust tell_the truth/Let's start it over,/Or call it over/Bring your love backJro me baby, somehow/{Start it over or call it 2. How much have you each discussed your over) family backgrounds? We usually don't realize greater N( 5 must "tell the truth" about what they want. Such decisions are difficult. While there are when no perfect ways to measure readiness for mar- }robl riage, the following questions can help uate your readiness mr mm commttment. 1. How well do each of you communicate personal needs, feelings and questions about the relationship? You each need to verbalize what you want in the relationship. Just asimportant is how you well feel about discussing what matters most to each of you. (Your comments ore always 1 Please address: Charlie Martin 182, Rockport, IN 47635.) Reviewer: Magic Johnson shouldn't ride God's By JOSEPH R. THOMAS CathoDic News Service Earvin "Magic" Johnson, the basketball Merlin whose storybook career unexpect- edly collided with the HIV virus, now fancies himself an educator with a God-given mission ("working for God's agenda," as he puts it) to pro- claim the life-serving benefits of protected sex if self-control proves unduly burdensome. That is one of the main strands threaded through "My Life" (Random House, $22}, written by Johnson with William Novak, who special- izes in this sort of thing but does nothing for his reputa- tion with this potboiler in which cliches are as plentiful as in-your-face boasts. The book owes its exis- tence -- and its success not to the compelling nature of the tale but to the teller's status as a cultural icon whose charismatic smile is as familiar as a Henny Young- man joke. One wishes that Magic hadn't tried ,to hang on to God's coattails because it is painfully evident that his en- counter with the virus that causes AIDS is not the reli- gious equivalent of Paul being knocked off an ass. Re- ligious leaders haven't been lining up to authenticate the source of Johnson's mission- ary call, nor axe they likely to do so as long as the message being conveyed is the un- Godly equivalent of "Yeah, man, sex is a great little pas- time but when things heat up play it cool." Lest this seem like a carica- ture, here is Johnson, a for- mer choirboy, posing some questions on sexuality in a chapter headed "Women and Me": "Is it really wrong for an unmarried man to have con- senting sex with an unmar- ried woman? With many women?... As long as nobody gets hurt, what's wrong with sex between unmarried adults?" Unfortunately, as an educa- tor Johnson is everything E.F. Hutton would like to be. The world, galvanized by the media, literally stops to listen when Magic weaves his spell. I say unfortunately because the Johnsonian gospel is nothing less than the gospel of hedonism. Here again let us have recourse to Johnson's own words: "People make all kinds of choices in their lives. Some drink. Some smoke. Some eat too much. That wasn't me. RUXER My pleasure was being with women .... (It was) one of my favorite ways to relax." True, Johnson .admits to having made mistakes as he cut a wide swath through the cities that dot the NBA sched- ule. But it is clear that in his viewthose mistakes con- sisted of engaging in unpro- tected sex. Sleeping around was the league norm and he makes no apologies for it, boasting that even in this re- gard he became the team leader on the Los Angeles Lakers. Apparently this was no mean achievement be- cause, he tells us, the Lakers were not known as Boy Scouts and Los Angeles is considered something of a mecca for those with Olympian sexual appetites. Not that Johnson didn't have certain standards. En- counters in an elevator or on a desk in a woman's office while a meeting was in II I I I I I i JASPER 482-1200 I I I III FORD - LINCOLN - MERCURY iii I I II I I I III I I Hi.Tech Sheet Metal Inc. Residen[ial, Industrial & Commercial Heating & Cooling Installation Sales & Service [ 422-9242 I Operated by Michael and Patricia Koch" 15 S. Third Avenue, Evansville I I I I II II I III |1 I I AUTO TOPS. SEAT COVERS. BOAT COVERS STEREO SALES & INSTALLATIONS I I I 254-3943 HWY 50 EAST, BEHIND UPS CENTER EUGENE WELP, OWNER I I I I I ir progress in the next room were one thing but he did draw the line at sex in a phone booth. Sex before a game was also a personal no-no ("I might spend the afternoon with a woman, but I would never have sex until the game was over") nor would he ever spend an entire night with a woman ("It just didn't feel right"). Thankfully, "My Life" was not written to whet anyone's sexual appetite so we are spared the sloppy details. But what makes this such a sad tale is that Magic Johnson's life can speak eloquently about so many important things: dedication, hard work, team play, mental discipline, dence, winning and: and even che face of an imp el calamity. An epilogue black teen-agers is larly forceful could have beerll stronger had JohnSC dressed himself as young women as to men. But on sexual even though here he has a near-apol to say about Magic Johnson has a credibility of that great I tie of promiscuity, Hefner. EVANSVILLE AND SHOPPING FOR THE BEST PLUMBING SERVICE RESIDENTIAL COMMERCIAL (FREE ESTIMATES) GRANT PLUMBING CO. 484 S. 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